My mom says “Have iniciative, do stuff around the house, you’re a girl! You have to learn to take care of a house”. And I just stare at her…not because of the ‘you’re a girl’ comment, altough that was infuriating, but because I simply don’t have the energy anymore. For nothing really…All I can muster is waking up, watching and reading, and going to class when it’s absolutely necessary. It’s been like this for a while, I just have no clue what I’m gonna do in the near future…I don’t have any plans. And that what paralises me, the fear, fear of not knowing what do I want, much less how to get what I want, and I just can’t. I can’t deal, can’t go out, can’t get up, can’t date, can’t study, can’t be happy, can’t decide, can’t move.
Mom and Dad weren’t thrilled to learn that I like girls, you know, that way. Mom kept talking about how she was afraid my life would be so hard, “living that lifestyle.”
Like life is so much easier if you just pretend to be someone you’re not. But at the end of it, I didn’t get disowned or kicked out of the house.
ALO ALO GRACAS A DEUS! GENTE ALGUEM AJUDA TO PASSANDO MAL